Who the hell am I?
I've always been a moody, anxious child. From elementary through high school I cried a lot for no apparent reason. I couldn't explain it, though I understand better now as an "adult".

Perhaps it's in the stars. The distinct combination of being born a Pisces (it almost always rains on my birthday), with a Scorpio Moon (sex/death obsession/complex), and Aquarius Rising (original/independent--often defiant--thinker), AND female is apt to result in self-indulgent, self-deprecating, introspective, and angst-ridden art. So that's my excuse for what I write. It's a psychological purging, a catharsis. My therapy, if you will.

On writing poetry & songs:
I wrote my first song, I think, when I was 14. It was about flowers and shit and it stunk as well. It had no structure and too many notes. I was writing poetry around then, too. Always about trees and nature. (I think I was suppressing something.) Then there was the one when I was 19 about how it sucked to work for the man. And a third about the process of writing a song itself. All very boring and trite. But you gotta start somewhere.

At the end of high school and throughout college is when I really started to get into meaty subjects, usually pertaining to broken relationships (at which I excelled) and the ever-present existential angst. By the time I got to my freshman year of college (Bentley, Waltham, MA), I had already written 40-50 poems and received an A+ in Poetry 101 for essentially submitting a book of my own extra credit material. Some were a capella folk songs, most were tuneless poems, and a few have gone on to become material for the band today.

As a Comparative Literature (i.e., English) major (transferred to Simmons Collge, Boston, MA), I was greatly influenced by the literary masters: Blake, Baudelaire, Dante, Dickinson, Milton, Rilke, Shakespeare, Stevens, and T.S. Eliot, amongst others. On my own, I read a lot on witchcraft and neo-paganism. And then there were the philosophers: Descartes, Kant, Nietzsche, Plato. And I studied modern artists: Braque, Deschamps, Kandinsky, Picasso. They all influenced my writing, but Shakespeare especially for his rhythm and rhyme schemes. My poems were often printed in the collegiate literary rag. I loved college. It opened my mind. Still, I was fundamentally depressed.

My musical experiences and influences:
From elementary through high school (Waltham, MA), I always took Chorus. Unfortunately, I never learned to read music and still can't read or write it to save my life. I was in all the chorale sections of my junior high and high schools' musicals as well. I tried out for dancing and acting roles, but I couldn't follow the former (although I took ballet and tap and am an avid dancer!), and I just plain sucked at the latter. Sometimes I had solos or duets, but nothing major.

My musical interests run the gamut of genres. I listen to everything from Fiona Apple to Nine Inch Nails, Laurie Anderson to XTC, Machines of Loving Grace to Red Hot Chili Peppers, Duran Duran to U2, Alice in Chains to Peter Murphy and of course, Sisters of Mercy, whose song Lucretia, My Reflection is, in part, after which the band is named. I love disco, sometimes folk, blues, and Celtic music, but mostly new wave and goth/industrial. I am a child of the 80s, after all. Dark synthpop is my ideal marriage of audio heaven & hell.

Why I started the band:
As I mentioned, I was a moody, anxious child. Like many adolescents, I lacked direction and a sense of worth in this potentially apocalyptic nuclear world (it was the 80's, remember?). As a result, I had several therapists growing up. Most were bad, unfortunately. Still, I was searching.

Throughout college, and in addition to my required reading as an English major, I read volumes of human psychology and relationship books to understand what the hell was wrong with me. I seem to be doing better these days, thanks in part to my last therapist, who annoyed me occasionally, but, unlike anyone before him, he also pushed me to take my art seriously. Case in point: he convinced me to take a songwriting class (conducted by singer/songwriter Kendra Flowers) instead of taking a gratuitous vacation in July, 2001.

There, I met Andrew Berlet, a guitarist in the local rock band Xerotonin. On our first day of class, we went around the room telling everyone what kind of music we listened to. (I mentioned NIN and other dark-edged bands.) One of our assignments was to swap a written piece (whether or not it had a melody) with someone else in the class to have them interpret it musically. Frustrated with my many tuneless poems, I gave Andrew, my designated swap-ee, a college-era piece, Scapegoat, hoping he could come up with something. Knowing that I liked industrial music, he played for the class a recording of himself on guitar, singing it in my preferred style. I almost cried--in a good way. We looked at each other like Hey, you can play; I can write and sing; we must do this again. I started showing up at his place regularly for him to put instrumentation to my a capella songs and for us to develop melody/instrumentation for my poems. Anyway, long story longer, I blame my therapist for my forming a "band," because after working with Andrew, there was no going back.

Not long after Andrew and I began working together, my esteemed friend and housemate, Alex Levin--with the help of his ex-girlfriend's used bass--began playing with us under Andrew's instruction. Alex learned quickly. And so we were three: singer, guitarist, bassist.

Performances & Spaces:
I began my house parties around 1993. They were on and off, sometimes one a year, three, or none. Always themed, with over-the-top decor designed exclusively by neurotic old me, there were regularly three annually: Halloween/Samhain (Oct.), Pisces/my birthday (March), and Summer (June). (I started the Pisces Party as a way to ensure that I, always extra morose on my birthday, would be surrounded by friends and fun or at least a major distraction.) At these parties, I encourage performances and art displays of all kinds. It was an excellent excuse for me to inflict my guests with my a capella songs and poems before I had my own band. In the beginning, performances were largely non-musical. Now that I have a band, music takes precedence.

Meanwhile, I'd been performing at many local venues outside of my home, including Cambridge, MA coffeehouses/open mics such as the Cantab, the Lizard Lounge, Out of the Blue Gallery, Stone Soup Poetry (then at TT The Bears and, later, Zeitgeist Gallery), MITers, and Dance Friday.

Andrew graciously played two of my house parties with me as Lucretia's Daggers: Halloween 10/27/01 and (with Alex) my Pisces Party 3/2/02 to great acclaim amongst my black-clad friends. Shortly after the Pisces Party, he announced that he would regrettably no longer be able to work with me due to prior commitments with his band, Xerotonin. I was devastated by the news. We had nine songs under our belts. I didn't know how I would proceed without a mastermind guitarist like him. But I knew I just couldn't stop. I couldn�t NOT be in a band now. And I had everything recorded on tape!

In April, 2002, Cusraque A. Dominy of ManRay Club fame was planning an animal-themed Hell Night. He needed a fish to perform during an on-stage party scene. Someone told him I owned a mermaid costume, so I immediately became said fish. I showed up a couple days before performance night to practice my part and re-met Darrell Brown, a long-time acquaintance of the pagan and dance communities. Catching up on old times, I mentioned to him that I had had a band, but recently lost my guitarist/collaborator. Darrell said he had played guitar (amongst other things) for years and wanted to be in a band again. I gave him a copy of my tape. His response, upon listening to Andrew's riffs, was: I think I can do that. The very next month, we started collaborating and recreating what Andrew and I had started.

So again there were three: Darrell, Alex, and me. That summer, however, Alex moved to New Mexico so we were then without a bassist. In June 2002, post-Gemini/Summer Party, I sent my usual aftermath party notice via email requesting more band members, including a keyboardist, bassist, and drummer. Mark Cloherty, a friend on that email list, suggested his girlfriend, Stephanie, as the band's potential keyboardist. I hounded Stephanie online for months, even though I didn't know her, until Mark finally brought her (as her roadie). She was pleasant to work with, could play well, and she looked good three things required of all my bandmates! We immediately took her in. That was September 2002. Shortly before that year's Halloween performance party, we convinced Mark, who admitted to some strumming himself, to join us as our bassist. I think my exact quote was, Don't just sit there and give us feedback, get up and play, dammit! So he did. Then there were four.

As of June 2005--and many permutations later--the band consists of Lauri Murphy/Lucretia X. Machina (vocals/lyrics/melodies) and Futurist Tarquinius (guitar/sequencer/arranger). From May-July 2007: iodine (bass) and Ms. Spyglass (backup vox). Band lineup as of May 2007: Founder and lyricist/vocalist Lucretia X. Machina, lead guitarist Elucid, and drum programmer/keyboardist DrDK.

While its members may come and go, LD will continue to grow its dark lyrical electro-rock family and cultivate its sad flower songs. We wish to count you amongst our friends and experience the Daggers for yourself. Please join us at our shows and check out our CD. 

And thank you for reading my thoughts splayed on the page for your approval like psychic entrails to be picked apart and examined thoroughly. My songs will keep evolving and expanding to include new subjects and styles, but I assure you they will still be moody and anxious, just like me. ;-) 

Sincerely,
Lauri Murphy (aka Lucretia)

Photo by Chris Williams
FX by Futurist Tarquinius